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Telling my son

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SASSY SOUL



Joined: 05 Jan 2008
Posts: 52
Telling my son

To cut a long story short - I had my fist lesbian experience when I was 19, stuff happened, I ended up leaving Melbourne and moved to London. Had two short relationships with men which were a disaster and have been single on purpose since my son was 4 months old. He is now 9 and I have finally been honest with myself and know who and what I truly am. I'm not straight or bi I'm gay or a lesbian. The relief I feel at coming to this realisation or whatever you want to call it is such feels like a demon has been removed.

However, when I asked my son a few questions he appears to have the mentality of a village kid and isn't that open minded to this side of life. I asked him again last night what he would do if I told him I was gay - he said do you mean lesbian. I said yes and he wasn't happy at the thought. He appears to have preconceived ideas of what it means to be gay or lesbian. When I pointed out that two people we know are a couple he was shocked. This showed me that he has taken on the opinion of others ie his mates. They are very short sighted in our village be that about sexuality or race so it is what I expected but it doesn't stop me being disappointed.

I'm really worried now. We have a close relationship and have an open and honest policy on everything.

I have no intention of discussing this anyone at the moment but wonder if I should just leave it for the time being or perhaps arrange time together with other lesbian women so he can see there is no difference between them and anyone else. Or should I slowly introduce the concept in through discussion so it becomes just something else that he learns about?

Any advice would be appreciated

Post Sun Jan 06, 2008 2:31 pm 
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realwoman



Joined: 05 Dec 2005
Posts: 1040
Location: under our tree in Africa


Dear (((big)))))

What i think you should talk to him about, is not you being gay, but about prejudice, in general. He is the right age to learn about the problems prejudice can cause. He is ready to hear about the pain inflicted by prejudice against people of colour, people with handicaps, people who are not the same as what society tells itself is 'right' and 'wrong'.... he needs to learn now that he should make up his own mind, and not share the prejudices of society... that way, whenever he understands the concept of prejudice, he will be ready to understand and accept his mother for who she is

Just teach him that, and that he need not to share the opinions of his friends, but can have his own, and you will HUGELY contribute to him being a good man...

Hugs

~real
_________________
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light is to darkness as love is to fear...

Post Sun Jan 06, 2008 4:04 pm 
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SASSY SOUL



Joined: 05 Jan 2008
Posts: 52


Thanks for that. Iv'e spent a lot of time re-educating him about every other aspect of the 'minority' culture but have never touched on this. Why? I am unsure - guess it has never come up.

Post Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:58 pm 
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