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Poetry Forum Index -> Emotional Poetry

Short & Sweet "I Am Separation"

LifeVita6
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CindyT



Joined: 09 Nov 2012
Posts: 159
Location: Florida
Short & Sweet "I Am Separation"

I am separation
Forging my existence apart from you
I am pain of division
Learning the myths of separation
Conceiving the new without you

Post Wed Feb 06, 2013 10:37 pm 
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MysteryGirl
Moderators


Joined: 02 Jun 2007
Posts: 3419
Location: I come from a land downunder


Yeah... I guess there are a few of us who know of what you speak there Cindy Sad



HugZ, MG
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Be yourself.............everybody else is taken!

Post Thu Feb 07, 2013 9:23 am 
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ae



Joined: 17 Sep 2006
Posts: 1025
Location: that tragic backwater, the gulf coast of florida


"the myths" of separation caught me up short...

We're alla time reading about the realities of it.

Thanks for the moment of "hmmm"....



ae
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"...a soul that wakes up to find itself wandering, unwanted, between the spheres."

Post Sat Feb 23, 2013 10:55 pm 
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CindyT



Joined: 09 Nov 2012
Posts: 159
Location: Florida


yes, the myth for me was that it (separation) was so awful bad...etc ... the reality was different than what was expected. Probably the problem with this piece is that it's just out of my head, inspired by something I read. I'll work on it some...maybe fallacies instead?

I do appreciate the comments/suggestions.... I'm not a professional writer but I do want to write well... I guess you could say I have aspirations, but at least I'm not choking... Razz

By the way, I've a few posted in the Other Poetry catagory...I would love to know what you think...

CindyT




Cool

Post Mon Feb 25, 2013 11:07 pm 
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ae



Joined: 17 Sep 2006
Posts: 1025
Location: that tragic backwater, the gulf coast of florida


Dear Cindy--

I have yars and years of experience with gentle, yet meaningful, critique. I will be looking for your goods. I am very sick and mostly pretty mind weary these days, though, so don't expect much. BdeCauntenton is a GREAT critic, but she is a VERY classical stylist.

Look forward to seeing your work.

ae
_________________
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"...a soul that wakes up to find itself wandering, unwanted, between the spheres."

Post Tue Feb 26, 2013 1:54 am 
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CindyT



Joined: 09 Nov 2012
Posts: 159
Location: Florida
ae

thanks ae...thanks , sorry to hear you are not 100$ nor am I at the top of my form... working with the docs but it's hard being uninsured and on a fixed income. I am interested in how a person feels about what I write as well as constructive suggestion about form and all that Cool

May I ask where you live? I live in Hawthorne Florida, a one light town about 35 miles from Gainesville, home of the University of Florida, the Gators and the Swamp. Yes, I really do like college football! I know weird for a lesbian, but I love watching guys beat the hell out of each other.

If you are interested, PM me here at Mels, and I wil give you my facebook name so you can check out some of the (if I may say so myself) awsome pictures I have posted of my local.

Thanks for your interest and comments.
CindyT

Post Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:43 am 
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