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Story Forum Index -> Emotional Lesbian Stories

My World

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Eilidh
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Joined: 09 Apr 2005
Posts: 1880
My World

This isn't exactly an "Emotional Lesbian Story" per se, but it is my story and it is inherently emotional and inherently lesbian, so I'll take the liberty to post it here. Mods: Feel free to move it or delete it if it's in the wrong place.

My World

I’m one of those people who has always been ridiculed for being “too sensitive”. My parents scolded me for crying, teachers thought I was simply conscientious, friends thought I was too quiet. I was always lost in my own world without knowing I was lost.

I go for days without talking.

I experience the world intensely. Every tiny change to the environment around me makes my heart pound, my jaw clench, my lips quiver. Every moment I live in anxiety and every morning at work I look forward to going home. My perfect day is marked by curling up in front of the fire with a good book and a cup of tea.
Safe and serene.

People constantly question: “What’s wrong with you?” as if I am somehow less human. “What’s wrong with the world?” I want to counter. Most days, it's just too much.

Imagine someone scratching their nails against a chalkboard 24 hours a day. Imagine the cringing, hands over ears, the overwhelming urge to yell "Stop that now!" This is my daily interaction with the world. This is my life.

Sounds I can’t stand:
The ticking clock
Loud music, especially with a throbbing bass
Forks clanging against ceramic plates
Sucking noises old people make with their mouth
Chewing
Scratching
Breathing
Anything but absolute silence

Sights I can’t stand:
Jaws chewing gum
Fingers tapping impatiently
Fidgeting body parts
Pictures hanging unevenly on the wall
Dim lights
Fluorescent lights
Crumbs
Clutter

Sensations I can’t stand:
Dish soap
Cookie dough
Bubble baths
Massages
Kisses
Contact beyond a handshake

Trains
Buses
Trolleys
Cars
Too loud. Too fast.
Too many details.
These are my daily nightmares.

My only freedom:
My bicycle,
The wind blowing in my face
And the city lights behind me.
Bliss in a moment
Escape from sensory hell.

Post Sun Jan 27, 2008 9:12 pm 
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Allison



Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 4216
Location: Florida


WOW is all I can think to say Eil.

Alli
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Alli

Post Sun Jan 27, 2008 9:49 pm 
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Eilidh
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Joined: 09 Apr 2005
Posts: 1880


quote:
Originally posted by Allison:
WOW is all I can think to say Eil.


That's quite enough, Alli.
Thank you for reading.

~Eilidh

Post Sun Jan 27, 2008 10:23 pm 
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LatinChica



Joined: 15 Nov 2007
Posts: 13


Pretty deep, Eilidh.
I'm amazed. Exclamation

Post Mon Jan 28, 2008 6:43 am 
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Alpenglow



Joined: 02 Feb 2007
Posts: 607


end

Last edited by Alpenglow on Sat Sep 20, 2008 7:55 am; edited 1 time in total

Post Mon Jan 28, 2008 7:26 am 
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lori



Joined: 19 Aug 2007
Posts: 1454


This is sad and touches my soul Eilidh.
I'm thinking many of us have a degree of this in ourselves.
To quote Alpen, I'm pretty anti-social in the real world... though most folk here would probably never think that. Wink
thankyou for sharing.
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WHEN I FALL, I LOSE MY HEART AND FILL THE SPACE WITH HER..

Post Mon Jan 28, 2008 11:01 am 
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Eilidh
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Joined: 09 Apr 2005
Posts: 1880


quote:
Originally posted by LatinChica:
Pretty deep, Eilidh.
I'm amazed. Exclamation


Latin,
Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I appreciate your words.

~Eilidh

Post Mon Jan 28, 2008 3:37 pm 
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Eilidh
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Joined: 09 Apr 2005
Posts: 1880


quote:
Originally posted by alpenglow:
One of the many reasons I have always disliked Aristotle is his quote : "Man is by nature a social animal". Man is not a social animal to me. He is just crafty enough to have realised there is safety in numbers, so he formed societies and set behavioural rules the human race must abide by. And, unfortunately, along with the rules came clutter...

Not many people understand sensitivity. Sad but true. Being lost in your own world in front of a fire is fine. In fact, you are in touch with your inner self and Nature. I noticed no Nature sounds are included in your sensory hell. That put a smile on my face.

An honest and genuine write, Eil. Well-done.

Alpen
Exclamation


Alpen,

That's an interesting interpretation of Aristotle!
You're correct in your observation of my relationship with Nature. I could easily take up residence in a cottage deep in the woods somewhere, not to be bothered by other humans and human creations, but that wouldn't be very fair to my family! Nor would it be very practical .... darn.
Thank you for your comments, Alpen. I truly appreciate your insight.

~Eilidh

Post Mon Jan 28, 2008 3:46 pm 
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Eilidh
Moderators


Joined: 09 Apr 2005
Posts: 1880


quote:
Originally posted by lori:
This is sad and touches my soul Eilidh.
I'm thinking many of us have a degree of this in ourselves.
To quote Alpen, I'm pretty anti-social in the real world... though most folk here would probably never think that. Wink
thankyou for sharing.


lori,

It's interesting that this piece appears "sad". To me, the experience is more frustrating than anything else ... which can lead to a lot of sadness, of course.

An anti-social lori? I'll believe that one when I see it! Laughing

Seriously though, thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I truly appreciate the effort.

~Eilidh

Post Mon Jan 28, 2008 3:49 pm 
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Alpenglow



Joined: 02 Feb 2007
Posts: 607


end

Post Mon Jan 28, 2008 9:41 pm 
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