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ghost
Joined: 06 Nov 2005
Posts: 2828
Location: MIA |
something most of us have in common...
hi all
i normally dont post something like this, but it was just toooo funny...
This was an actual letter sent to Kotex by somebody who works for the Netcare Group.
Dear Kotex,
I recently noticed that the peel-off strip of my panty liner had a bunch of "Kotex Tips for Life" on it. Annoying advice such as:
- Staying active during your period can relieve cramps.
- Avoiding caffeine may help reduce cramps and headaches.
- Drink 6-8 glasses of water a day to keep you hydrated and feeling fresh.
- Try Kotex blah blah blah other products
Obviously the individual behind this was someone who has never possessed a functioning set of ovaries. Go ahead and tell a men * struating woman that drinking 6-8 glasses of water will help keep her feeling fresh. See what happens and report back. I'll wait.
While you're at it, dump out the coffee at work and remove the chocolate from the vending machine. I garan-friggin-tee that the first responders will be females who just ovulated.
Look, women don't need or want tips for living on feminine hygiene products. Younger girls are already hearing "helpful" crap like that from
their elderly relatives. Veteran females have already concocted their own recipes for survival, many containing alcohol.
Printing out shit advice while sneaking in ads for the brand that was already purchased is just plain annoying, not to mention rude, and enough to send a girl running to the Always brand.
Mostly we'd like to forget that we even need these products. It's not a fun time, but DO NOT try to cheer us up by adding smiley faces or bunnies or flowery cutesy crap to your products or the packaging. Put the sh * it in a plain brown wrapper so we can throw it in our carts discreetly and have it blend in among the wine and beer. There is nothing more annoying than having a blinding pink package announcing your ute * rine state to everyone in the store.
So take your tips for living and shove them right up your a * ss.
Ovarily Yours,
Miss PMS
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MIA
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Thu Sep 14, 2006 1:43 pm |
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Falling_Star
Joined: 07 Aug 2006
Posts: 23
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Thank you for posting this Ghost I needed a good laugh, the bad part its so true.
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Always here to hear your wishes
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Thu Sep 14, 2006 2:18 pm |
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Northern Jane
Joined: 19 Feb 2006
Posts: 69
Location: Manitoba |
ROFLMAO!!!
Sounds like somebody was pre-menstral!
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Thu Sep 14, 2006 4:23 pm |
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DanceofSorrows
Joined: 29 Aug 2004
Posts: 2837
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LOL Ghost, good one.
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Thu Sep 14, 2006 7:49 pm |
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Start Over
Joined: 02 Nov 2005
Posts: 222
Location: Somewhere in the cosmos |
I've felt like this for a long time. About damn time someone else did!
LOL
Cheers
Start
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Fri Sep 15, 2006 5:37 am |
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Xalia1
Moderators
Joined: 05 May 2004
Posts: 3702
Location: In love |
~laughs hard~
This was great.. thanks Ghost!
Hugs,
Xalia
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Nobody said life would be easy...They just promised it would be worth it.
~♥♥~
~The words fail me.. because what I feel for you is beyond description...~
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Fri Sep 15, 2006 1:35 pm |
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DamagedGoods
Joined: 13 May 2006
Posts: 550
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I guess we can be grateful they aren't printing cute little animals on the actual pads! I know in Australia we have very cute guide dogs on at least one brand of our toilet paper... I only wanna wipe my butt on it for crying out loud!!! Thanks for the laugh, Ghost!
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All poems posted by me, unless otherwise stated, are written by me, DamagedGoods, and are ©2002-2009 and must not be used anywhere else without written permission and my copyright details in tact. Thank you.
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Fri Sep 15, 2006 2:04 pm |
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lionsfyre1
Joined: 22 Apr 2006
Posts: 19
Location: house springs, Mo. |
this was a hoot thanks for sharing. I have thought for years that someone should invent something like the "vaga-suck" you know suck it out and be done with it guess it doesnt work that easy.
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Fri Sep 22, 2006 1:22 am |
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Mairi bheag
Joined: 04 Mar 2005
Posts: 5094
Location: Scotland |
Y'know..... a depressive Kotex employee, who only wanted to help, probably went home, put all his/her things in order, left his/her clothes on a beach, and disappeared for ever.
Mb
xx
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all posted material (c) Marie Marshall, unless otherwise stated.
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Fri Sep 22, 2006 4:29 am |
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Mairi bheag
Joined: 04 Mar 2005
Posts: 5094
Location: Scotland |
Yeah, but out of sight, out of mind!
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all posted material (c) Marie Marshall, unless otherwise stated.
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Fri Sep 22, 2006 7:01 pm |
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DarkChyldesKiss
Site Admin
Joined: 29 Mar 2005
Posts: 3381
Location: Inner Sanctum |
ghost!
LOL! I didn't know they were now advertising on kotex! I had a partial hysterectomy 10 years ago so I no longer walk down that aisle every month.
I think this warrants as top of the most irritating advertising!
I wonder if they put helpful tips on the condom wrappers! lol Probably not that would be too easy!
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(All works are copyrighted and protected.
DO NOT copy my writing without Permission!)
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Sat Sep 23, 2006 8:00 pm |
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Mairi bheag
Joined: 04 Mar 2005
Posts: 5094
Location: Scotland |
Jan - could you stand a hysterectomy joke?
M
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all posted material (c) Marie Marshall, unless otherwise stated.
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Mon Sep 25, 2006 5:30 am |
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