"well, i did it, i came out..
and contray to watever misconseption, i dont feel better! i feel horrib;e!
my mother cried! and asked me where she failed me, and how she went wrong...
she asked me why i had choosen my life of sin? despite trying to explain to her, that i wud nto chhose the life i live, or too cause her such pain, she just didnt understand...
then she called my aunt, who preached, and told me that one day, im gunna look back and regret my choices, and that i need to turn to god for guildance, and that im not praying hard enough, and that i need to return to church (the same church that speaks openly againts gays)
my mom said she appreciates my honesty, and that its goin to be ok, but i feel that to her, ok means, 'k, be straight now, forget all things queer, and ur gf is definately outta the question'- which aint gunna happen!
i feel like she expects me to get up, and be done with it- well mom, if that were possible, i wudda done it 9 yrs ago..
so now, i feel like things r gunna be even harder- b4 when i wanted to see my gf, i'd just lie. but now wat?
yet again, i see no middle ground, im just the hopeless sinner that satan is working ohh soo hard on...
since then,
-she went out and got pregnant right after- she is now due in febuary
-she forced me to go to church weekly- that didnt last long
- me and my gf are stronger than ever- we have been threw this storm together
-my mom still cusses and preaches everytime i go see the gf, filling my inbox with nasty horrible messages, but its gettin alot better
-we talk and laugh like we used to - it just took a long time, and alot of abuse from her firrt- but thats wat pateince is for
and now- things are gunna stir back up b/c my gf is moving in town so i dont have to travel to far to leave my mom and the baby!
Thu Dec 06, 2007 4:04 pm
Alice In Quantum Land
Joined: 04 Dec 2007
Posts: 77
*kisses*
Fri Dec 07, 2007 7:15 am
wyrdfae
Joined: 26 Nov 2007
Posts: 6
Location: Houston, Texas, United States
Growing up, my parents always said pretty messed up stuff about gay people. I remember there were 2 lesbians who lived across from us and I asked my mom why she was so cold around them when they seemed so nice and she went off about the evils of gayness or whatever. She believed that people only think they are gay because the other kids called them that. Seriously. They were very "love the sinner, hate the sin". I know this was there stance about 6 years ago.
Lately my mother was talking about a friend of hers in high school who she only saw with his partner at her reunion. She then said maybe they were afraid to be out together because its a small town and that she wouldn't want to live somewhere that she couldn't be herself and happy.
I thought maybe she is a pod person, but people do tend to mellow with age. Give her time and she will come around.
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