Joined: 03 Mar 2010
Posts: 28
Location: Somewhere in Southern California
IsSheReal (F)
IsSheReal
I watch her walk around her room,
doing the most mundane things,
unloading the bags
she brought to my house,
and I am filled with
comfort,
longing,
joy,
and wonder at how
this amazing creature came
to be in my life.
Why, I wonder, does she like me?
What about my picture and profile
made her “wink” at me?
What does she see in me?
No, not what, how,
how does she see in me
the things
only I seem to know are there?
And “winking” at me,
how did it come to pass
that she spread a ring
of hope and light around my heart?
This woman,
like none I have ever known,
looking, on the outside,
not one bit like the woman
my heart imagined,
inside looks and feels
like exactly
what we imagined
and dreamed of
for years.
This woman,
is she real?
3/12/10 _________________ Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep. Scott Adams
Writing is easy, you just stare at a blank page until beads of blood form on your forehead.
Mon Mar 29, 2010 5:35 pm
Eilidh Moderators
Joined: 09 Apr 2005
Posts: 1880
mmHuggins,
Two parts of this poem were particularly vivid for me:
1) the beauty and awe in the mundane
and
2) looking, on the outside, / not one bit like the woman / my heart imagined [...]
If you plan to revise this poem, I would particularly build upon those two sections.
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