Joined: 17 Sep 2006
Posts: 1025
Location: that tragic backwater, the gulf coast of florida
29 Minutes to Freedom
2:06
I swallow without breaking the capsule
2:08
One last holler at nothing
2:10
I am waiting for the blur
2:12
I confess my understanding
2:13
I mourn my misunderstanding
which is different than mourning
What I misunderstood
2:14
Is no different than 2:13
2:15
Is just another minute of emotional math
deducting the cost of the lesson
from the price paid in waste
because I never really needed
anything more than what I had
2:16
Still waiting, still waiting
2:16:30
Still
2:17
I taste my own breath
Perhaps it's disgusting, but maybe
that's the stench of what I believed
finally rotting in my cerebellum
2:18
How long is this supposed to take?
2:20
The sun comes out and I
almost change my mind
Perhaps I could do yard work, instead
This is the longest minute I've ever seen
2:21
2:22
I remember that watching numbers
Used to matter to me with a weight
akin to knowing Kierkegaard
And I notice that I no longer care
What the numbers are, or about
Being there at the precise moment
They change
2:23
Still, nothing's happening
2:24
Except change
Slow and inexhaustible
Unforgiving, irresistible
Forgiving, irresistible
Impartial, irresistible
2:25
I am bored of this and notice
My desire to struggle
Against nothing
2:26
And still no blur
Might as well have some water
2:27
My hearing shuts off in one ear
For just a moment
Then I hear the garbage truck
In stereo again
2:28
Things just are
But I am waiting for some things
2:29
I would not have expected this
to take so long
2:30
I am editing prior minutes
with the sudden power to
change history.
2:31
It's ridiculous, of course
But the idea so delights me
That I stop waiting
For the next moment
And enjoy living in this one
For as long as it lives
2:33
Ah... the blur, the blessed blur...
At last, at last, at last...
2:35
Post _________________ -
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"...a soul that wakes up to find itself wandering, unwanted, between the spheres."
Mon Feb 02, 2009 7:35 pm
MysteryGirl Moderators
Joined: 02 Jun 2007
Posts: 3419
Location: I come from a land downunder
Yeah , me too, this is scary gf
Noni _________________ Be yourself.............everybody else is taken!
Tue Feb 03, 2009 5:04 am
DarkChyldesKiss Site Admin
Joined: 29 Mar 2005
Posts: 3381
Location: Inner Sanctum
ae
I'm not sure why I stopped by to read this. The title made me curious out how freedom could come in 29 minutes.
Joined: 17 Sep 2006
Posts: 1025
Location: that tragic backwater, the gulf coast of florida
Freedom=sleep, rest
Sorry about that... In my hyperfocus, it didn't occur to me at the time that it could be alarming.
I'm not as miserable as that! I'm not even particularly miserable, actually. Just cleaning out old stuff, mostly...
But thank you for your concern, my friends.
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"...a soul that wakes up to find itself wandering, unwanted, between the spheres."
Tue Feb 03, 2009 2:19 pm
DanceofSorrows
Joined: 29 Aug 2004
Posts: 2837
Ae,
Things are still processing and that is certainly ok! Old stuff, new stuff, in the middle of the road stuff... it can be all in unison sometimes. I perceived this poem to be translucent, and I love that. A moment where the shades pull apart and for 29 minutes... it is all translucent. That is powerful stuff.
Dance~
Tue Feb 03, 2009 2:43 pm
cmichelle_0817
Joined: 17 Mar 2008
Posts: 106
Location: Chicago
Ae~
I can see in one way how this was perceived as a little "scary", but I think your creativity is genius...I truly enjoyed reading something so very different. Cheers to you!
Hugs~
Cari _________________ Don't spend so much time making a living that you forget to make a life...
Tue Feb 03, 2009 4:52 pm
Moonshine
Joined: 16 Jan 2008
Posts: 470
I read that you had taken a sleeping pill to get past insomnia and the countdown until it kicks in. I burst out laughing at the lines:
2:30
I am editing prior minutes
with the sudden power to
change history.
I didn't detect anything sinister (going to back now to see if I missed the plot there) but to me, it was a brilliant description of a cameo moment!
Great
Moon _________________
For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return. --Leonardo da Vinci--
Tue Feb 03, 2009 8:40 pm
ae
Joined: 17 Sep 2006
Posts: 1025
Location: that tragic backwater, the gulf coast of florida
Dance--
Hmmm... you're right about that simultaneity, now that I think of it. Thanks for "seeing thru" the moment.
ae _________________ -
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"...a soul that wakes up to find itself wandering, unwanted, between the spheres."
Tue Feb 03, 2009 10:17 pm
ae
Joined: 17 Sep 2006
Posts: 1025
Location: that tragic backwater, the gulf coast of florida
Cari--
That is quite the compliment! I am very grateful, and glad you enjoyed the read!
ae _________________ -
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"...a soul that wakes up to find itself wandering, unwanted, between the spheres."
Tue Feb 03, 2009 10:19 pm
ae
Joined: 17 Sep 2006
Posts: 1025
Location: that tragic backwater, the gulf coast of florida
Moon--I can imagine you getting a good chortle out of that! I had one myself. And yep, that's all it was... a little chronicle of assisted nodding off.
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"...a soul that wakes up to find itself wandering, unwanted, between the spheres."
Tue Feb 03, 2009 10:21 pm
Avant-garde
Joined: 20 Jul 2006
Posts: 2850
Location: NY
ae,
You are gonna give me gray hairs women......Glad you are okay. Try some tension taimer tea its relly works. Lil pills make me worry.... You are really a good writter and friend wouldn't want anything bad to happen to you.....
hugs, _________________ ~poetry is the lover ,mine artistic soul, and the keeper of my tormented mind.
Wed Feb 04, 2009 12:01 am
ae
Joined: 17 Sep 2006
Posts: 1025
Location: that tragic backwater, the gulf coast of florida
No worries, there dear. I take my meds as prescribed, or well short of it. I have a resentment against pills myself, so it's not often I utilize them. But thank you, Nancy. I so appreciate it all your kind words.
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"...a soul that wakes up to find itself wandering, unwanted, between the spheres."
Wed Feb 04, 2009 1:16 am
smart_cookie
Joined: 12 Aug 2006
Posts: 2310
Location: USA
Guns aren't lawful
Nooses give
Gas smells awful
May as well live.
(Dorothy Parker)
Last edited by smart_cookie on Wed Feb 04, 2009 8:51 pm; edited 1 time in total
Wed Feb 04, 2009 1:46 pm
ae
Joined: 17 Sep 2006
Posts: 1025
Location: that tragic backwater, the gulf coast of florida
Cooks, I believe you have thus bestowed upon me the coveted red dot! Of course, it's not really EARNED by the PIECE, since I basically just scared everyone into it, but ...tee-hee.... gotta red dot! _________________ -
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"...a soul that wakes up to find itself wandering, unwanted, between the spheres."
Wed Feb 04, 2009 8:12 pm
butchwithdimples
Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 19
nothing better
ae
i think i am falling in love with you over these posts lmao
keep em coming cause i am not just yet ready to hit the bottom
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