I once was independent, happy in my life
I didn’t ask you to come along.
I didn’t want you to come along.
I needed no one but myself.
You made me want you.
Made me need you in ways
I never thought I could need at all.
And I saw myself changing,
Saw the differences within.
I wondered at each and every one,
Thought about the consequences.
I sat awake at night debating,
About whether or not I could be
Who you wanted me to be.
And if I did complete the transformation,
If I would like who I became.
The answers came slowly,
The ease I felt when you held my hand.
I knew it would be alright,
And fate was keeping her secrets,
But that didn’t scare me anymore.
So I let myself go,
Relinquished the past.
Grasped the future with both hands.
Hands that now tremble.
I’m losing my grip.
Four years,
Three months
Twenty-five days
Six hours
Forty eight minutes
Since I walked into your arms
For the first time.
So long ago,
Yet, it wasn’t so long ago.
Where is it.
The trust I saw when you looked at me.
The peaceful flow of understanding.
That flash of smile, just for me.
Where are you.
You see me as the enemy.
With your silver on my hand.
A chain round your ankle
With no key to release.
You think I don’t know you.
Don’t respect your mind.
That I need your money.
That I need so much.
Truly…I need so little.
A meeting of minds is not to be.
Mutual communication not to be found.
My grip is getting looser….
Where will I land?
Do you think I want to let go?
I’m terrified.
But I will.
I will let loose the hold
I’ve held so firmly
And I will release any promises
You are afraid you will break.
If only to let you know
You aren’t a captive.
You are free.
Free to stay,
Free to go.
Free to love me
As I’ve loved you,
From the moment we met.
I will not cry
Nor will I beg.
I do not believe
It would make a difference.
You see me as you wish
And I cannot change that.
Just like you can’t change
The person I’ve always been.
I’d hoped we’d grown together…
You say we’ve grown apart.
So…
Where does that leave us.
Xalia _________________ Nobody said life would be easy...They just promised it would be worth it.
~♥♥~
~The words fail me.. because what I feel for you is beyond description...~
Mon Feb 07, 2011 7:58 am
MysteryGirl Moderators
Joined: 02 Jun 2007
Posts: 3419
Location: I come from a land downunder
_________________ Be yourself.............everybody else is taken!
Mon Feb 07, 2011 9:20 am
MdmPrez
Joined: 16 Oct 2007
Posts: 803
Location: US of A
X
((((((((((((((((((((((((((( X ))))))))))))))))))))))))
((((((((((((((((((((((((( X ))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Love, Cat
Mon Feb 07, 2011 2:37 pm
melons Site Admin
Joined: 06 Feb 2004
Posts: 2371
(((((((((((((Xalia))))))))))))
I'm so sorry you're feeling blue, you need the biggest most massive hug... (((((((((((((((((((Hella hugs)))))))))))))))))). Perhaps putting pen to paper has helped....even if only a little, it's a beginning.....
Remember, you ROCK.
Luv'n'hugs,
Mel xoxox
Tue Feb 08, 2011 12:23 am
Angel1 Moderators
Joined: 09 Mar 2007
Posts: 1518
Location: U.K
((((((((((((((((((Xalia)))))))))))))))))))
Awww sweetie,i'm so sad to see that your down
Sending you an abundance of positive energies in the hope that they will help you in some way... at this difficult time.
(((((((((((((((Hugest "Hella Hugs" )))))))))))))
much love
Angel x x x _________________ "We are not human beings having a spiritual experience.
We are spiritual beings having a human experience."
-Pierre Teilhard de Chardin (1881-1955)
Mon Feb 14, 2011 11:09 am
SDSAllN1
Joined: 27 Sep 2006
Posts: 6
Location: St. Louis
Good Job, X, the first time I log in for a while and this is what I read? Ugh, just make me cry . I love you!! We need a girls night out! _________________ When in life you are lost just take a look at what you have, for when you see you are found and life is once again around.
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum
Gallery
FAQ
Profile PM's 
