Joined: 05 Dec 2005
Posts: 1040
Location: under our tree in Africa
I HATE IT, DAMMIT
Ek háát dit, demmit - vir die noordewind
(Met apologie, en dankbaarheid aan Lize Beekman:
“Vergewe my as ek ongeleë pla om hierdie ding te vra?
Sal jy kyk vir my tussen al jou goed, jou polonek en jou Levibroek … want my hart is soek?”)
2005-09-25
...............................
Voel jy beter?
......................................
Is jy OK?
.......................
Noudat jy my uit jou lewe
................
uitgevee en weggeweer het?
.......................................................
Wel, dan is ek bly!
..............
want ek wil jou glad nie daaraan herinner dat ek ons vriendskap mis nie. Verskriklik.
.......
en jy hoef nie enigsins te weet dat ek donners spyt is dat ons dit so opgefok het nie. Letterlik.
ek sal dit haat om te dink dat jy gebodder is met donker gedagtes van ons borste nog sag teen mekaar,
....
en ek hoop werklik dat jy nóóit aan my mond en hande sal dink nie, veral as jy en hy probeer paar …
.......
Want ek glo jou graag as jy sê dat ék jou donker kant laat uitkom het - dat dit net 'lust' was
..........
en ek wens uit my diepste wese dat jy elke aand lekker vas sal slaap, sonder enige las
.............
en rustig en salig en onbewus van my en die feit dat ek so hope(gruwe)looslik rou
..............
en bliksems seer en donners hard geval het vir daai einste donker kant van jou?
............
Ek haat dit om te dink dat ek nie kan losbreek nie; dat ek daagliks oor jou wil uitvis
...................
ek verpes dit dat jy eintlik nog onder my vel, en nog altyd in my drome is
......................
dat jy my steeds, selfs nou, uit die werk, en uit die lewe kan weghou
..............................
omdat jy my hart by jou het, haar onwetend(?)vasklou.
.........................
Ek wil nie hê dat jy jouself óóit moet blameer nie. My pyn is myne.
..............................
En my hartseer oor ons, is ook mos my eie verdiende loon
....................................
want jy het dit nie bedoel nie? Dit was die wyne!
.......................................
Ek is só bly jóú gewete is ten minste skoon…
.....................................
En ek hoop werklik jou lewe is nou weer A – OK
.............. ... ......................
En dat jy voortstoom, elke dag onverpoos
...................... ......................
terwyl ek my hart soek, en bly stry
........................................................
alhoewel vrugteloos
..........................................
Want sy lê waarskynlik snoesig en knus
...............................................
tussen jou klere onder in jou kas
.................... ... ........... ......................
waar jy ook is?
....................... ........... ...............................
Né?
..................................... ...................
Ek háát dit, demmit!
(Real is deeply indebted to Hawny who showed her how to hide the dots - now the poem has the kitch shape it deserves... - lol)
_________________ .
.
light is to darkness as love is to fear...
Last edited by realwoman on Sun Jan 29, 2006 11:08 am; edited 6 times in total
Sat Jan 14, 2006 8:07 pm
realwoman
Joined: 05 Dec 2005
Posts: 1040
Location: under our tree in Africa
...and the translation, as always, imperfect...
I HATE it, DAMMIT - for the northwind
(With apology, and grateful thanks to Lize Beekman, beautiful Afrikaans songstress:
“Vergewe my as ek ongeleë pla om hierdie ding te vra?
Sal jy kyk vir my tussen al jou goed, jou polonek en jou Levibroek … want my hart is soek?”)
2005-09-25
...................................
Are you doing fine?
............................
Are u actually OK?
..............................
Now that you have erased
.....
and
......
deleted me from your life?
....................................................
Well, then I am happy for you!!
...........
Because I don’t want you to have any idea how much I am missing our friendship. Terribly.
.....
and you won’t ever know or get an inclination of how damn sorry I am that we fucked it up. Literally.
...
I will hate to think that you are bothered with dark thoughts about your breasts still softly against mine
and I do hope that you never think of my hands, ...when you and him are attempting to procreate by design
...
because I believe you when you say that it was ME who unearthed YOUR dark side, that it was just 'lust'
...
and I wish from the bottom of my heart that you will sleep peacefully every night, without any fears due
......
soundly and serenely and still and unaware of me and the fact that I am so hope(shame)lessly just
.........
raw and bleeding and hurting from falling so damn hard for that same dark side I found in you
.............
I hate it to think that I cannot break free from you, wanting to always have you at my side
...................
I am disgusted that you are still under my skin, showing up in my dreams at night
.......................
you cause me to procrastinate my work, and you are keeping me from my life
.........................
since you are holding my heart, dammit, and you don’t even know it, right?
.............................
I don’t want you to ever blame yourself. My heart, my pain, mine!
................................
and my desolation about us, our friendship, I earned it dear
....................................
because you did not intend any of it, “it was the wine”
...........................................
I am glad YOUR conscience is at least clear
..............................................
I really hope your life is not falling apart
..................................................
and that you can tackle every day
.......................................................
while I search for my heart
..............................................................
albeit fruitlessly
.............................................
Because she is probably lying snug and tight
....................... ............................
in your closet between your clothes
.............................................................
where your are too
......................................................................
Right?
................................................................
I HATE it, dammit!!
(and this is a historical poem - I have recovered a long time ago, allready!)
_________________ .
.
light is to darkness as love is to fear...
Last edited by realwoman on Tue Jan 24, 2006 5:28 am; edited 2 times in total
Sat Jan 14, 2006 8:54 pm
Mairi bheag
Joined: 04 Mar 2005
Posts: 5094
Location: Scotland
Myself, I hate the bloody keyboard.
I love this, though.
Mb
xx
_________________ all posted material (c) Marie Marshall, unless otherwise stated.
real,
It is very lovely, sad...somewhat sweet and painful.
Hugs,
Eiregirl
Mon Jan 16, 2006 12:17 am
Jules
Joined: 22 Feb 2005
Posts: 904
Location: Home
Real,
There is so much of this that hits right where it hurts. It's a deep pain, one that sneaks up on you when you least expect it, and when you really aren't prepared to deal with it.
In short, I really, really like this one. Trouble is, everytime I read it, it's going to make me cry......
Jules _________________ Never again
Mon Jan 16, 2006 2:27 am
ghost
Joined: 06 Nov 2005
Posts: 2828
Location: MIA
real
i told you you could...
and it's a pity about the shape, i share your frustration.
regards and keep posting
ghost _________________
MIA
Mon Jan 16, 2006 5:20 am
Guest
this poem really was great... i think that Jules said most of it...
en ek hoop regtig dat dinge beter raak vir jou
Mon Jan 16, 2006 7:14 am
SWAY
Joined: 14 Apr 2005
Posts: 1560
Location: Upstate NY
Real,
you finished dotting!
I really enjoyed this poem. I've been there, done that.
Hugs,
SWAY _________________ Giving myself to others has made me jaded...
Mon Jan 16, 2006 12:52 pm
Ximene_Xuxa
Joined: 27 Dec 2005
Posts: 135
Location: Gardening
Wow, I don't think any shape in type was needed to know the shape of the borken heart described. Awesome poem. I felt every bit of it deeply and have much sympathy. *hugs*
xoxo
-suz-
Tue Jan 17, 2006 3:20 am
realwoman
Joined: 05 Dec 2005
Posts: 1040
Location: under our tree in Africa
((((((((((JULES))))))))
Thanks for seeing the trouble with this one!! And you are right, it is damn sneaky...
*winks and blows a kiss to the b/day girl*
_________________ .
.
light is to darkness as love is to fear...
Tue Jan 17, 2006 10:30 pm
realwoman
Joined: 05 Dec 2005
Posts: 1040
Location: under our tree in Africa
(((((Lady Mary Dawm of Dames!!!))))))
*Real is really glad u liked it - and shoots your damn keybord*
(((((SUZ))))))
Thanks for the greeat compliment and the hug hun!! (and the silly shape is needed to show me how silly I was!!!)
((((((SWAY)))))
Having been there makes us stronger, now does it not?? Thanks for watching me make the dots, vroumens - and i hope it helped with your lessons - lol
Valentines hearts to all of you!! _________________ .
.
light is to darkness as love is to fear...
Tue Jan 17, 2006 10:41 pm
realwoman
Joined: 05 Dec 2005
Posts: 1040
Location: under our tree in Africa
(((((Eire)))))))))
Glad you thought it was lovely, sad and sweet - next time we meet in chat, I will tell u the gory details....., unless we make another sneaky plan, of course - lol
(((((Fairy)))))
Dankie dat jy kom lees het - en dinge is al LAAANKAL beter, maar thanx, anyway!! Sal in Nam gaan kuier en alles bieg....
(((((((SPOOK)))))))))
Thanks for the encouragement, dear, and do let me know if you find out how to shape these things!! En dankie vir die hulp, ook!
Valentines hearts to all of you, tooooo!! _________________ .
.
light is to darkness as love is to fear...
Tue Jan 17, 2006 10:48 pm
Guest
:)
yay!! ja kom kuier gerus
sal wag
Wed Jan 18, 2006 11:37 am
realwoman
Joined: 05 Dec 2005
Posts: 1040
Location: under our tree in Africa
FAIRY!!!!
Ek was al baie op jou dorp - sal jou verseker laat weet as ek weer daar verbygaan!
Hou die Windhoeks en Tafel Lagers koud!
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